I have been really busy for the past few weeks, trying to finish my work and project in Jakarta before flying back to Helsinki at the end of this week. As usual, things never really worked the way I planned it to be, but overtime I have learned to accept and to go with the flow rather than pushing for things to get done prematurely.
Today I had some spare time to go through my old notes again, since the writer’s block is apparently has not yet been resolved. The interesting thing about reading your own old writing is to discover the person you were, and to remember the state of mind you had while writing each particular notes. When “aged” for a period of time, an old notes can be a powerful reminder of your past, and from there, you can make a choice if you want those part of yourself to still be around in the present time.
With love –
Jakarta, 17 April 2017
My teacher Paul Dallaghan told me once that “yoga is like a relationship. When the butterflies have stopped fluttering their wings, you will have to find a common ground to stay grounded and continue to grow”.
I started yoga in January 2007 and that delicious first downward facing dog hooked me instantly to the practice. What’s not to love? The excitement, the exhilarating adrenalin rush, the anticipation of what come next, the hype and all the highs that comes with an ever inspiring and exciting yoga class. Its like falling in love. You just cant be too far away from your love. All you want to do is to be nearby, all the time gazing and searching from the corner of your eyes.
But what happen when all this excitement dies down? When going to classes becomes just another boring routine? When you desperately looking for new inspiration to fuel the practice so that you can keep going for another day? I have been going through all this ups and downs many times and what makes me came to ground is the fact that no matter how hard things get, no matter how painful, am still here. Back on the mat doing my morning Sun Salute and seated practices.
My practice is the one constant in my life which I know, I will have no matter what. Its like an anchor that grounds me down when am weary, or distracted, or simply lacking the stability. My mat is the safe haven ( or a panic room sometimes ) where I can be myself, release whatever it is that no longer serve me and in time help to define my center.
My life, my love, my passion.
Very much like a relationship, yes?
But it is a relationship with yourself.
Yoga practice shows you who you truly are, reflects back at you so sharply that sometimes its just so painful to see and experience. But look at it this way : if you can handle a relationship with you inner demons, you can handle a relationship with anyone.
To stay centered, and to act from the space of Love.
As Paul said, “use your practice to support you. To have everything at the softness of the heart. That is how you will grow. That is real love”
Samahita, the Summer of 2013
** Paul Dallaghan is the founder of Samahita Retreat in Koh Samui, Thailand.